In order to reach our fullest potential or a potential that is closer to optimal, and in order to become a fully actualized personal, we must recognize the power we have in shaping in reality, and then, ultimately, take responsibility for that. If we are faced with hardships and challenges, at any point in life, a negative approach would be to dwell on the misfortunate, to see oneself as the victim, the injured, the unfortunate, and then to see reparation, pity, and vindication. All of which utilize an energy that is far more negative than that which I wish to have governing my life.
To grow, one must look at hardship and challenges as opportunities to flex one's internal muscles, and chances to learn and grow or act on something. Whenever I have been personally faced with significant hardships, I have turned to personal writing to help my process what is happening in my life. I've come to call this kind of writing "Warrior Writing," see myself as a warrior, in defense of my goodness, my gifts, and my peace of mind. We have to defend and protect these parts of our psyche, self, and should. They are the good that we have to bring into this world and we are responsible for them and to them. Writing is a tremendously powerful tool that enables us to celebrate and remember positive events, and resolve internal negativity that comes from negative life events. In this way, we are able to seek and maintain the balance we each need to be uplifted and truly shine our shine.
I hope that your will find ways to keep your inner warrior strong and fight one of the most important battles in your life.